Monday, August 9, 2010 Fresh Corn and Exploding Heads

I spent the majority of my morning trying to figure out how to nicely tell people that canned corn isn't fresh.

Yeah. I know.

I stumbled across the "Taste" section of last Thursday's paper this morning. There was a section called "Recipe Box" in which people were to share their fresh corn recipes and fresh blueberry recipes. Imagine my surprise when half of the corn recipes called for canned corn! One called for creamed corn - which I am proud to say I have never eaten. But if I was going to ingest it you can be damn sure I wouldn't be eating it out of a can.

My head almost exploded.

As I read on I was shocked to see that Ms. Canned Creamed Corn had also submitted a blueberry recipe that called for COOL WHIP! And CANNED BLUEBERRY PIE FILLING!!!!

Wha wha what???

Now, you people know me, so I'm not going to mince words.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!?!?!

It took a few drafts and the help of numerous Facebook friends but I was able to craft a sensible letter stating my case. Simply put, if you claim the recipes are “fresh” and “good for you” the ingredients better be fresh and good for you.

In less than a half-hour I received a reply. I was invited to send in my own recipes, told how difficult it was for them to get submissions in the first place and then reminded that every recipe won’t appeal to everyone.

I think she missed the point.

If the heading said “Recipes for Corn” and the recipes used canned corn I WOULN’T BE WRITING THIS! It said FRESH CORN!!! CANNED CORN ISN’T FRESH!!!!!!

I’m going to the emergency room, I’m having a conniption.

When I get back I think I’ll make it a point to send these people some real, fresh, good for you recipes.

Until then… Bang on, my peeps!

-HH